We Fight Battles
It's time. Moving on with another stage of life (or more specifically, returning to a previous stage of life forsaken years ago).
We were made to keep a journal then. I am not exactly a diary-keeping sort, but i was very meticulous with that particular journal. It held 19 weeks of hopes and fears, of ups and downs, and of successes and failures. I'm grateful for that. I guess i was meticulous because it was an avenue to air my thoughts in a situation where other forms of communication were less accessible.
The bottom line is that the writing style in that journal belonged to me. I never know whether my superiors read it or not, maybe they did. Planning to keep one again in the upcoming months.
It might lead me down the same slippery path again. I might want to approach the problem in a different way. I have no idea how i want to think about the problem. Mulling? Or just go with the crowd. It's all very conflicting.
4 years ago, i was traumatised by that one thing in June and July. One serious case of the big D - losing 2kg in one week. Now, i'm grateful for that episode. It bought me 7 weeks of the upcoming battle.
Now, from nowhere i have to draw on my strengths once again. To cope with the endless guilt trips, the unrelenting chronic stressful situations and worst of all the unpredictability of it all. It's not easy - i respect those who have gone before me, but it's not me.
I'll try. I'll even think about making the end.
Week 1 begins monday next.
We were made to keep a journal then. I am not exactly a diary-keeping sort, but i was very meticulous with that particular journal. It held 19 weeks of hopes and fears, of ups and downs, and of successes and failures. I'm grateful for that. I guess i was meticulous because it was an avenue to air my thoughts in a situation where other forms of communication were less accessible.
The bottom line is that the writing style in that journal belonged to me. I never know whether my superiors read it or not, maybe they did. Planning to keep one again in the upcoming months.
It might lead me down the same slippery path again. I might want to approach the problem in a different way. I have no idea how i want to think about the problem. Mulling? Or just go with the crowd. It's all very conflicting.
4 years ago, i was traumatised by that one thing in June and July. One serious case of the big D - losing 2kg in one week. Now, i'm grateful for that episode. It bought me 7 weeks of the upcoming battle.
Now, from nowhere i have to draw on my strengths once again. To cope with the endless guilt trips, the unrelenting chronic stressful situations and worst of all the unpredictability of it all. It's not easy - i respect those who have gone before me, but it's not me.
I'll try. I'll even think about making the end.
Week 1 begins monday next.
posted by Monty Elm at 9:45 pm
1 comments
1 Comments:
Managed to dig out something really old, which I've once written somewhere. Could be the blog, on msn, or the like, can't remember. Yes, try it. You might be surprised. Even if it doesn't work out, all's good - there's still tomorrow!
"Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense. This day is all that is good and fair. It is too dear, with its hopes and invitations, to waste a moment on yesterdays."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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